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Poet, 28, male,. Blue eyes like the bottom of the Atlantic. Seeking female muse. Thatʼs all it will ever be.

Thu, 2 Oct 2008 00:00:00 GMT

Poet, 28, male. Blue eyes like the bottom of the Atlantic. Seeking female muse. Thatʼs all it will ever be.

Box 06/06

South Bank surfer, 29, female. Seeks riding companion, or just someone to stop and talk to.

Thu, 2 Oct 2008 00:00:00 GMT

South Bank surfer, 29, female. Seeks riding companion, or just someone to stop and talk to. Shy and lonely but much to give. Will be browsing books outside the NFI from 11am - 4pm, on days with a 'y' in them. Look for pale pink cardigan and dayglo sash.

Box 05/06

Undergraduate, 19.

Thu, 2 Oct 2008 00:00:00 GMT

Undergraduate, 19. Allergic to beer, vomit, Carling Academies, spliffs, Noel Edmunds, obnoxiousness. Seeks similar for conversations not about Hollyoaks. That's all.

Box 04/06

Good looking undiscovered treasure trove of writing talent, male, 26.

Thu, 2 Oct 2008 00:00:00 GMT

Good looking undiscovered treasure trove of writing talent, male, 26. Seeks older lady in the publishing industry. Age and looks not important. Must wield reasonable level of power. Discretion guaranteed.

Box 03/06

Ex-banker, 33. Flew too close to the sun.

Thu, 2 Oct 2008 00:00:00 GMT

Ex-banker, 33. Flew too close to the sun. Recently released both from lucrative City job and malicious, depraved, gold-digging wife of 6 1/2 months (yes the two are linked). Seeking woman not interested in money, fast cars, champagne, holidays, fleecing innocent hard-working gullible twats, whilst telling them you love them. Bitch.

Box 02/06

Insomniac writer, 50s, unnecessarily blonde,

Thu, 2 Oct 2008 00:00:00 GMT

Insomniac writer, 50s, unnecessarily blonde, seeks reason to go to bed. A man would do.

Box 01/06

Young penguin, M 24, is looking for an older F on the sixteenth floor to give him a leg up.

Fri, 1 Aug 2008 00:00:00 GMT

Young penguin, M 24, is looking for an older F on the sixteenth floor to give him a leg up. Or a hand. We’ll be running the place in no time.

Box 06/05

I am a great person, you should probably take me out on a date.

Fri, 1 Aug 2008 00:00:00 GMT

I am a great person, you should probably take me out on a date. F 27, not short of confidence, likes good food, sharp conversation and ambitious men.

Box 05/05

Girl with bike

Fri, 4 Jul 2008 09:00:00 GMT

Girl with bike seeks boy with bike for regular bodywork and routine maintenance. Ding ding.

Box 04/05

26 year old girl

Fri, 4 Jul 2008 09:00:00 GMT

26 year old girl would like to spend time with someone who likes to spend time alone. Blood type O, which denotes a predilection for nuts, may also come in handy - or great guns that can crack walnuts if not.

Box 03/05

Tall, dark and winsome male

Fri, 4 Jul 2008 09:00:00 GMT

Tall, dark and winsome male puts the "sexy" back into dyslexia

Box 02/05

Mr T. lookalike

Fri, 6 Jun 2008 09:00:00 GMT

Mr T. lookalike , 56, WLTM 'cuddly teapot' for trampolining and other water sports. Must be under 5ft.

Box 04/04

Tired of beating around the bush?

Fri, 6 Jun 2008 09:00:00 GMT

Tired of beating around the bush? Shaven althete with GSOH seeks aerodynamic male (18-50) for windy walks. Must have dog.

Box 03/03

Slap my arse and call me Shirley.

Fri, 6 Jun 2008 09:00:00 GMT

Slap my arse and call me Shirley. That’s all I want.

Box 02/03

Are you an aficionado of Paradise Lost?

Fri, 6 Jun 2008 09:00:00 GMT

Are you an aficionado of Paradise Lost? Can you quote extensively from Revelations? Are you a fan of late night Beethoven? Does the sound of passing traffic suggest that you live in an urban conurbation? If so please stop calling my home. Its not funny any more. If not, I could do with a change so please feel free to start.

Box 01/03

Romance is dead.

Fri, 23 May 2008 18:00:00 GMT

Romance is dead. So is my mother. Man, 42, recently minted.

Box 04/02

40, but could pass for 39 in the dark

Fri, 23 May 2008 18:00:00 GMT

40, but could pass for 39 in the dark. WLTM a wealthy woman with a dodgy ticker.

Box 03/02

Loyal and loving ex-marine

Fri, 23 May 2008 18:00:00 GMT

Loyal and loving ex-marine looking for a girl with a good sense of humour who enjoys eating out, going to the cinema, walks at sunset and doesn’t mind being called sir.

Box 02/02

Lawyer, 25, perfect specimen,

Fri, 23 May 2008 12:00:00 GMT

Lawyer, 25, perfect specimen, WLTM self for obsessive trysts and drownings in calm water. Failing that, any woman with large, blue, shiny and highly reflective eyes.

Box 01/02

Young man seeks ex-girlfriend for self-esteem,

Thu, 24 Apr 2008 00:00:00 GMT

Young man seeks ex-girlfriend for self-esteem; or the girl from Spearmint Rhino on the Tottenham Court Road (green dress, brown hair, Thursday) who said I was different. Pls reply to any of my numbers/email addresses - you've both got them.

Box 06/01

Female, 26.

Thu, 24 Apr 2008 00:00:00 GMT

Female, 26. Chess champion looking for a pawn to play around with. No commitment required. Flexible hours. Knights preferable. But won't do Queens.

Box 05/01

The only people who sleep with me are narcoleptics.

Thu, 24 Apr 2008 00:00:00 GMT

The only people who sleep with me are narcoleptics. 24 yr old methamphetamine hobbyist looking for someone to chill out with.

Box 04/01

Female, bookish, 26.

Thu, 24 Apr 2008 00:00:00 GMT

Female, bookish, 26. Gave up corporate high-flying, emoticons and phrases like “do you have any bandwith today?” for intellectually snobbery, washing less and no money. Anyone afraid of sharks in swimming pools please apply.

Box 03/01

Male banker - 27, will be rich - currently not.

Thu, 24 Apr 2008 00:00:00 GMT

Male banker - 27, will be rich - currently not. Used to live in Fulham then moved back in with Mum. Self deprecating - sometimes. Generous lover - quantity not quality. WLTM older lady comfortable with sympathy for drug induced neurological disorders.

Box 02/01

How do I love thee?

Thu, 24 Apr 2008 00:00:00 GMT

How do I love thee? Let me count the ways. Four. Efficiently romantic man seeks woman.

Box 01/01